|| My Thoughts And Imaginations ||

updates

to make your day

Monday, September 29, 2008

I'm glad I have Tokio Hotel man. I really am.

Not in the mood to talk about anything though.

My day today was pure shit becoz I finally know what's going on and what really happened from Anira.

Yeah so I was like Shit. That explains why...

So yeah.

The physics paper was fine, I think.

Ok lh. I can do the questions and I remembered most of the formulas.

But my mind was drifting somewhere else all the time.

It was difficult concentrating.

But Bill pulled me through.

Then Diana, Suchi and Brintha tried to make me smile which worked becoz I was laughing at Mcdonalds :)

So yeah.

My stomach hurts.
Wenn Nichts Mehr Geht?
Yup. It a good stomach hurt. Made me feel so much better.
But you're still not ok huh?
Who wouldn't be? I din even know THAT happened. So yeah. Can we don't talk about this?
Yeah. Sure. For once I'm not forcing you to blurt out.
Yeah and I thank you for that....

Ouh and to Brenda Koh,
Thank you for everything.
You did a great job.
I give a wonderful salute to you.
I hope you're happy.
I hope you got your sweet revenge.
Now Maggie's not talking to me and I don't even understand why until Anira told me.
Great huh?
Wow.
Simply wow.
Good luck.
I'm not going to bother with you anymore becoz you're like Ein Staub in dünner Luft.
Isn't that what you do?
Haha.
I'm not angry anymore.
I find no reason to be fuming with rage anymore.

Thr truth is, I'm bummed. I really am.

But what can I do?

I'm just a weak human being under Allah.

He's the great almighty and I'm giving it all to him.

I surrender all of this to him, in hope that he'll answer my prayers and help me thorugh this time.

Ya Allah, aku tidak bermaya untuk cabaran ini. Kuatkan lah hati ku untuk berdepan dengan semua yang sedang aku hadapi. Engkaulah satu satunya tuhan yang maha Esa. Berikan aku kesabaran untuk hidup. Lindungilah aku daripada hasutan syaitan, mahupun syaitan manusia yang terkutuk dan kejam. Ya Allah. Aku berdoa kepada mu kerana engkau lah yang telah menjadi kan ku. Engkaulah yang aku sembah. Hati ku menangis tetapi mata dan mulut ku tidak dapat berkata-kata. Ya Allah. Bukakan lah hatinya ya Allah kerana dia adalah seorang yang amat ku cintai. Jauhkannya daripada hasutannya. Lindungilah dia seperti bagaimana engkau melindungi ku, keluargaku dan rakan-rakan ku. Aku berserah semua kepada mu. Amin

Es wird gesagt und getan
7:42 PM

Friday, September 26, 2008

Ok. Haha. Did alot of things with my blog :)

Gail :)

I hope it's ok but I won't give a fudge if you tell me it's messy or ugly or whaever becoz this is MY blog and I can do whatever I want with MY blog :)

Haha. Yay!!

Ich liebe es!!!

Woohoo!! Kk.

Not sure if still going Geylang.

Mum still sleeping so yeah :)

Not going guitar lesson tmrw coz wanna mug and do hair but I told James oredi and he said Okie!

Gail! He's the best teacher I've ever met!!! Wee Duu!!

Kk. Byez :)

I wanna watch the vids I put in my phone ouh and I will always change my song obsession :) Danke und guten tag :)

Es wird gesagt und getan
5:35 PM

Ok. Song obsession has changed. I feel like crying everytimg I hear this song. It's so sweet of Bill to write such a song :)

---------------------------------------------------

Today is Malay Paper 1 and 2 and I think I did fairly well for paper 1 but paper 2 was a fuck bull.

Let me tell you why.

Tandus - Kering and not berasa tandus.
Mengimbas or sumtin like that - Critics and not mengimbas begnya
Pegangan Hidup - Your prinsip of life and not something that you use to keep you alive like not giving up

I'm soooo going to fail man......

Talking to Ezabela right now through Quizilla messages. Gail. Haha.

I'm still obsess with this song :)

I wanted to type a one-shot. I really really wanted to but the problem is that I dun have anything to write on so I'm just gonna update on what I did today besides having the stupid paper.

I went home with Atikah just now and I miss her soooo much!!!

So yeah.

We walked to the bus stop at 7evelen there and while we past the condo, Atikah slipped and fell and it was fudging hillarious. Haha. The Indian security guard saw and he was trying to hold his laugh.

Then we took 174 to Boon Lay and we talked about.... I can't remember...

But upon almost reaching, I turned around and guess what I saw?

I saw this Hwa Chong girl and her boyfriend at the back making out. That was okay lah.

Then I turned back to talk to atikah again and then after that I turn again and guess what I saw now?!?

THE GUY WAS KISSING THE GIRLS BOOBS BUT LIKE NOT ON THE BOOB BUT THE CLOTHES OF THE BOOB BUT IT'S STILL BOOB RIGHT AND THE GIRL LOOKED FUDHING STEAM SIA!!!!

So I smsed Atikah who was beside me and she was like HUH? Really ah?

Then she turn but dun hav.

Haha.

Naughty naughty atikah... Haha.

So yeah. That's practically my day.

I'm going Geylang later so yeah.

Changing my hair tomorrow so yeah.

Guten Tag aite :)

Es wird gesagt und getan
3:20 PM

Thursday, September 25, 2008

Changed the song in my blog :)

Let The Flames Begin Live.

The version is fudging nice!!! I know the last part, Hayley is singing the lyrics from a bible but what do I care??

I LOVE HER VOCALS!!!!!

Haha! Ich liebe es!!!

Ouh and it turns out that Ezabel is from Singapore :) Haha! Gail :)

I tried to find the song for the blog at Imeem and MyFlashFetish but don't have so I uploaded my own :) I love it!!! Yay!!!

Yay! I uploaded it at Imeem!! I'm gonna change it now :)

Haha :)

-------------------------------------------------------

Ok. Now that's done :) Listen to it till finish ok :)

Just now was maths.

I'm gona fail.

Serious.

I left alot of question blank.

Section B was hard at the first part but it got easier at the back with the matrices and the triangle and all.

Then it was Geog.

It was fine, I think.

I seem to know how to do the natural vegetation instead of the plate tectonics all that.

I'm gonna pray that everything goes well for exams.

Haha.

My head hurts coz I tried something fun just now.

I tried to ~~headbang~~ like crazy, trying to imitate Hayley.

It was FUN!!

I headbang to alot of their songs especially this one playing rite now.

The beat of it is nice.

Very rockish and nice to headbang to.

Haha.

But need to get use to it though.

It's making me dizzy like crazy but me like.

I hope I get to make my hair today :)

I hope lah but I don't think I'm gonna do it today Again...

Haha.

Nvm.

Must be patient :)

I saw Mardiah's 'FRIEND' just now when I wanted to get into the MRT to JE.

Haha.

She hanged out with me, Brintha and Diana on a tree nearby Diana and of course, the 3 of us tk puase.

Duh.

Got reason ok :)

Then the BPAP came and they were like EEEEE Tk puase!!

Haha.

Then she say she waiting for friend but we know oredi.

Haha.

I think I'm gonna put that picture of me and Diana in Quizilla just like I did in Mibba but see first.

Macam malas.

Don't plan to study for Malay except for peribahase.

So that means I can slack today :)

Really really slack before I start on Physics and Bio tomorrow :)

Haha.

Kk.

I'm obsess over this song now :)

I think it's the 31th time I listened to it :)

Haha.

Kk.

I think I better go :)

I wanna bath ah :)

And I can still smell my stinky feet so yeah :)

Dada.

Ouh and no story idea today... So sad....

Maybe tomorrow. Yeah.

Haha.

Saje je aku :)

Es wird gesagt und getan
5:43 PM

Monday, September 22, 2008

Din know what to write about so yeah. Wrote a one-shot for fun :) I like the idea so much :)

It was dark and silent. Just like I expected it to be.

I knew He was waiting for me in the corners of the darkness, waiting to jump at me and ripped my throat.

Everyone I loved died because of him. He killed them all.

I admit that he's powers are beyond powerful. So powerful that he can kill the whole human population if he wants to.

Tom Kaulitz.
The vampire prince.
The heir to the next throne.
The chosen one.

The exact same vampire who killed my family and my friends.

I flinched when flashes from my past came to my mind.

The sound of him tearing their flesh apart. The blood splatters on the walls. The scream of agony filling my ears. The images were uneraseble. What he did was unforgivable...

"So you finally decided to show up. I thought you backed out." His voice breaking the silent that surrounded me.

Blood boiled within my skin as he stepped out from the dark, revealing his features.

Everything about him was vampire. Too perfect for a normal human being but Brown eyes stood out perfectly.

"I would never backed out. You owe me vampire." I sneered, taking out my knife.

"Easy human. I mean Nesa. You don't want to use that thing--" He chuckled evilly before dissapearing.

In a blink of an eye, he was behind me. His breath hot on my neck as he traced his fingers down my neck.

"Ah. You're blood smells wonderful. Smells lie nothing I've ever smelt. You're going to make one fine meal for me Nesa. You're going to die. Just like you family and friends did." He smirked as I felt his teeth coming closer to my neck.

I smiled before countering his move, this time, I'm on top of him, the knife gripped tightly in my right hand, aiming directly for his heart.

"You killed my family. You killed my friends. You killed too many innocent people to quenched your thirst. Now it's my turn to kill you. " I snapped before my eyes met his.

His brown met my grey ones. Staring at each other, ignoring the rest of the world that was around us.

For that moment of time, it felt as if nothing else mattered.

I could hear my heart beating so loudly that I was nervous that he could hear it too.

Why was I nervous? Is it because I could hear his heart beating too?

He right hand placed itself on my cheeks, slowly caressing it as if he was afraid that he'll hurt me.

What is happening to me?

"Stop it!" I shouted before forcing my right hand into his chest but before the knife could pierce his perfect skin, I stopped, tears threatening to spill from my eyes.

"What is wrong with me..." I mumbed softly before dropping the knife on the floor beside him.

I stood up, wiping my eyes with the edge of my sleeves, questioning myself what had just happened.

Why couldn't I kill him? Why? Why was there a thought of... Belonging when I look in his eyes?

I didn't understand everything. My purpose of coming here was gone. There was no hatred in me anymore. Just confused, lost and... in Love? No. I could't be.

"Kill me right now. Just kill me and drained me of my blood." I pleaded as I faced him, avoiding to look at him.

There was silence before he grabbed me by my collar, pulling me forward, his breath hot against mine.

He snarled, revealing his pair of fangs as he looked at me, from my eyes, to my nose, my mouth and finally, to the veins in my throat.

He smiled slyly as he leaned forward towards my neck, taking in a scent of what it smells like.

"Say goodbye, Nesa."

His last words lingered in my head.

I was going to die. I didn't fulfill my goals. My feelings got the best of me and it landed me here in the path of dea--

My thoughts were disrupted as his lips traced mine out.

I didn't move nor did he.

His right hand wrapped around my waist as my arms slowly made its way around his neck, playing slightly with his dreads.

The rush of blood thorugh my body was sensational. It was nothing like I ever felt before.

What is all this?

We stayed there for God know how long before pulling away, looking at each other, breathless and confused.

It wasn't long before that smile that I longed to see appeared again. This time, more beautiful than before.

"I'll see you soon, liebe." He said before walking away, leaving me alone, pondering over what had just happened.

I fell in love with a vampire in less than a minute and I just made-out with him.

Please tell me I'm insane...

But... I can't help but smile at his last sentence...

I'll see you soon, liebe

haha. Ok. It's my 2nd best work so far :)

Hope you enjoyed that :)

Good luck for exams :)

Don't stress aite :)

Just do you best :)

Guten Nacht :)

Es wird gesagt und getan
10:27 PM

Sunday, September 21, 2008

Really bored so I'm just gonna do some quizzes... I stole this from Beatrice though. Sorry Beatrice :)

Name 20 people
1) Bill
2) Tom
3) Gustav
4) Georg
5) Kak Nadhirah
6) Irfaniah
7) Diana
8) Brintha
9) Syuhadah
10) Atikah
11) Haiqal
12) Yah
13) Teik Wei
14) Vivian
15) Zhi Ting
16) Faiziyyah
17) Malcom
18) Shawn
19) Suchi
20) Maggie

-How did you meet 14? ||Vivian||
During Sec 1. She was my classmate.

-What would you do if you never met 1? ||Bill||
I'll be a sad sad person who cannot berak properly becoz I berak properly everytime I see Bill due to happiness and nervousness. :)

-What would you do if 20 and 9 dated? ||Maggie and Syuhadah||
Wow. I think Syuhadah would LOVE but Wei Liang will like kill Syuhadah. Haha. :)

-Did you ever like 19? ||Suchi||
Yup. of course I do :)

-Would 6 and 17 make a good couple? ||Irfaniah and Malcom||
Is it possible to laugh and berak at the same time? Becoz that's what I wanna do right now :)

-Do you think 8 is attractive? ||Brintha||
Yup. She's quite pretty you know but she doesn't want to tie her hair like the way I told her too!!!

-Tell me something about 7. ||Diana||
She's fudging funny

-Do you know any of 12's family? ||Yah||
Of course! I've been living nect to them for like.... 15 years? :)

-What's 8's favourite? ||Brintha||
Pink? I don't know. Never asked her but judging form her pink bags and bottle... Then PINK it shall be :)

-What would you do if 11 confesses that he/she likes you? ||Haiqal||
Of course he likes me! Wait, no. He LOVES me becoz I'm his sister... DUH!!

-What language does 15 speak? ||Zhi Ting||
Urrr Chinese and English. Tamil maybe?

-Who is 9 going out with? ||Syuhadah||
Her 9 A1s and her 1110399933838377736666 cucus :)

-How old is 16 now? ||Faiziyyah||
Dunno. Din bother knowing. 15 maybe?

-When was the last time you talked to 13? ||Teik Wei||
Friday. When I asked for my pen back :)

-Who is 2's favourite band/singer? ||Tom!!||
I know he likes Hip-Hop and RnB but I know one thing's for sure!! He LOVES Samy Deluxe!! :)

-Would you date 4? ||Georg||
I would... IF Bill gets jealous and fights with Georg for my love. Haha. In my dreams maybe. But nevertheless, I'll still go out with him if I like him. He's not a bad guy :)

-Would you ever be in a serious relationship with 11? ||Haiqal||
AGAIN!! He's my fudging brother!!!

-What school does 3 go to? [Fish]
Had no idea. The band doesn't seem to talk much about their schooling childhood. Maybe becoz they HATE school :)

-Whats your favourite thing about 5? ||Kak Nadhirah||
The fact that she likes Tokio Hotel too and we can spent hours or even days on the phone toking about TH and never get bored :) That's why she's my liebe :)

-Have you seen no.1 naked? ||Bill||
No and I DO NOT want to see him naked when I'm not related to him. I'm not a pervert who fantasises about naked lead singers who are effing hot and cute :)

--------------------------------------------------

Do you think you're wasting your time on the person you like?
Nein. I like wasting my time on Bill. It's worth better than wasting my time on boys who are effing stupid and clueless.

Can you fill this out without lying?
Yes. Duh. If not, I wouldn't take this quiz...

What's the last thing you put in your mouth?
Crabstick

Have you ever kissed anyone named Timothy?
Nein. Never. Never will. Never would. Nein nein nein.

Last people you rode in a car with under the age of 21?
My stupid but ok and still stupid and irritating brothers :)

Name someone that made you laugh today?
Uhhh... Myself?

What are you doing now?
Sitting down, doing this quiz, typing, breathing, thinking on how to update for Chapter 12.

When was the last time you saw number 6 on your top friends?
Huh? I don't get this. Really I don't :(

How late did you stay up last night and why?
12am++. Mugged and then read Twilight :)

Ever been kissed under fireworks?
Yes... Hehe. In my dreams, or is it my imagination. With Bill. Duh. Haha. But it's nice to have that happened to you :)

Which of your friends lives closest to you?
Yah. Next door. Approx 25 steps to reach her house :)

Do you believe exes can be friends?
Sure. Why not? It's nice to see Mardiah and Ariffin being thebest of friends aftre their break-up :)

What was the last thing someone bought for you?
HL milk which I used to make that stupid Mac & cheese whn I can actually drink it :)

When is your birthday?
21 JULY 1993

Who took your profile picture?
Never had it anymore. Haha. Can't remember also.

Who was the last person you took a picture with?
Diana I think...

Was yesterday better than today?
Haha. Everyday is unique so everyday is best becoz it's different :)

Can you live a day without TV?
Yup. I live 2 months without TV last time becoz the old TV that lived for 14 years broke down :)

What are you listening to?
Malay radio but I don't know what song.

Is anything bothering you right now?
Yes

Are you happier single or in a relationship?
have no idea. Maybe if that someone is someone I love and he loves me too, I'll like relationships better but currently, I'm ejoying my SINGLE life loving Bill Kaulitz :)

Where's the last place you went swimming?
Last year during June Holidays. I hate swimming.

Ever want to get married?
Of course!!

Who was the last person you hugged?
Diana yet again :)

What plans do you have for tomorrow?
School and more school shit :)

Where was the last place you fell asleep other than your own bed?
In the living room, alone, in the dark from 12 to 4 am and I survived!!!

How are things between you and your friends?
Some really good. Some ok. Some really bad :)

Do you forgive and forget?
As I said to Irfaniah, if you're sincere in keeping our friendship, then I'll forgive but NEVER forget :)

What is more important, happiness or trust?
Trust. Without trust, there's not happiness :)

Do you like your music loud or at a reasonable level?
I like it loud but not to full blast. Maybe if the maximum volume is 9, I'd probably put it on 7.5 :)

How did you and your number 1 become friends?
She's my cuzin and my bestfriend and my fudge and my bitch :) Kak NADHIRAH!!

What's the connection between you and the last person you texted?
Again. My cuzin. My bestfriend, my fudge, my bitch, my soon-to=be sister in law when I marry Bill and she marrys Tom :)

Do you hate the last person you were talking to?
No.

What does your 8th text message say?
Don't have. I deleted it. I hate having alot of smses in my inbox :)

What's the very first thing you do when you wake up?
Sit up, rub my eyes and check my phone.

Do you fold your laundry?
Yes... Sometimes...

Do you even KNOW how to do the laundry?
Of course! I washed my TH shirts and I know how to operate the washing machine... With my mums help of course :)

Most memorable thing that's happened to you this summer?
Dunno. Alot of events that are nice. Can't seem to pick one. And Singapore where got Summer??

Who's the last person that told you they loved you?
Can't remember...

When's the last time you had a headache?
Can't recall...

When did you get your very first kiss?
It got stolen from me in kindergarden...

Do you like reading?
Ja

Were you ever made fun of?
Ja. Teik Wei say my teeth like Wabbit.

What's/Who's always there to get you through the day?
Tokio Hotel. Bill Kaulitz. My friends. My liebes. Many more :)

What are you hoping to get this Christmas?
I don't celebrate Christmas...

Have you ever think about stuff and start crying?
No... I don't cry unless I cracked like shit and THAT happened recently... So much for not crying for 1 year++... Thank alot Faiziyyah...

Favorite swear word?
I don't know. It's between shit, shiesse and cheekeh... Hmmmm

Ever spin around in circles until you got so dizzy you fell?
A million and one times :)

What's the most comfortable thing you own?
My TH shirts :)

Do you wear the hood on your hoodie?
Sometimes. Depends on my mood :)

How long does it take for you to take a shower?
Depends on my mood. The fastest is 5 mins. The longest is 45mins :)

Have you ever stolen a sign from a street?
Nein... Can we even do that??

What was the last thing you were thinking about?
Is it even possible to steal a effing sign in Singapore?!?

If you could change your MIDDLE name, what would it be?
Um... Nein. I'll change my whole name!! Mazelina Winter Thorn :) I know. It's nice. Haha. :)

Is the moon out right now?
Nein. Din bother to see but what mood would be out in 7.04 in the morning??

What's the heaviest thing you own, besides a car?
My Aria guitar :)

Do you live on your own?
No. But I hope I will when I grow up :)

Whose car were you in last?
Taxi.

What's your relationship status?
Single. Duh. But attached, in my dreams, to Bill Kaulitz :) Wait. Not attached. MARRIED!!

Who was the last person to kiss you?
My younger borther, Haiqal. His mouth stinks...

When was the last time you held hands with someone?
Yesterday night.

Do you have a crush/like someone right now?
Yes... Two words... BILL. KAULITZ.

Have you ever wished upon a star for a certain someone?
I don't believe in wishing upon a star. I pray to Allah instead. Pray that he loves me and grants my wish :)

What was the weirdest moment with you and your bf/gf?
Can't remember. Been single for too long... Besides in my dreams, where I'm married :)

Is love even real to you?
Yup. Love is a strong force that everybody will get to feel. You know it's love when you feel it :)

Warm up near a fire or cuddle under the stars?
Cudle under the stars. If there's rain, like that's possible... Rain and starts, it'll be even nicer. You and him under the rain looking at the stars...Ahhhh

Who is the person you regret being/doing something with the most?
Um.... I'm not gonna say who becoz later I kana label insensitive again :)

Most romantic: flowers or chocolate?
Flowers but I like it when a black rose is presented to me... It's sweet in a way. Instead of the rose saying Go Die, it's like telling me, I'll Love You Till The End Of Time :)

If single... are you looking around?
Nein. Never. I love Bill too much to go fishing for buys...:)

Do you like being around a large group of friends, or two best friends?
Two bestfriends :)

What's one of your weird quirks that nobody really understands?
I like to laugh to no reason and some other stuff...

Ever thought about why grass is green?
No. They just teach us about it in Science.

Can you build a detailed sand castle?
Nein. I always have an ugly castle build.

Ever bit someone else's tongue?
EE. Nein.

Have you ever tackled someone to the ground?
Yeah

What's one of your favorite possessions?
I have alot!!! But I have to say.... My guitar!! Or my guitarS!!!

Do you like to sleep?
Sometimes yes. Sometimes no.

Is your bed comfortable?
Yup. Especially when I'm really tired...

What's the most awkward thing that happened to you in public this month?
The 2 cats. i can't remember when but Thrusday I think

Who's the last person that freaked you out?
Me, myself and I and I don't know why...

Who was the last person to compliment you?
Diana

What's in your purse/backpack/other(pockets, wallet...)?
Bill's hot, wet photo, my ezlink, my cards, my arab money, my papers and some other shit

Do you feel like life will be easier when you're older, or harder?
Harder cost I need to spent of bills and etc...

How come macaroni and cheese is so good?
Are you effing insane!! It's sucks like fudging shit luh!! How can you eat that foul stuff! It burns clothes!!

Is pink the new black?
I never really favoured pink that much so NO

What thought made you cry last?
That the Bladders had ended.

What is the most amount of money you would spend on a pillow?
I don't buy pillows, I'd probably use the money to but TH cds or TH shirts or my guitars :)

About how many white lies do you tell per day?
Depends but it's decreasing by the day. Sometimes, I don't lie at all in a day. I'm serious!!

Last book you read for pleasure?
BREAKING DAWN!!

If you google your name, what comes up?
Wait... I searching... Ok. It appeared on National Library Website, that time I won that book contest.
Appeared in 2E4')& blog.
Appeared in Mibba. Duh.
In BBSS website.
Yup.That's all :) Wow. I'm in net search :)

Whose birthday is coming up?
Nira's and Irafaniah's :)

Will you teach your own children abstinence or about birth control?
Nein. I know the school will teach them. The school taught me so I don't need to worry about my children..

How many days after you develop a cold until you go to the doctors office?
I don't go doctor. I use tissue tapper and panadols and towels and my blanket until it's all better :)

Ok.... That's done... TIME TO UPDATE MY STORY!!!MAYBE!!!

Es wird gesagt und getan
6:24 AM

Ok. It's 5.57am oin the morning right now. Haha. I know.

One thought before I continue....

Don't believe what the TV says. Macaroni and Cheese SUCKS. It taste foul and yuckie and I practical threw the whole pot away and my mum didn't mind coz the thing like cost $1.85. So REMEMBER. Don't eat Mac and Cheese!!!

Haha. Ok.

I mugged yesterday. I finished the notes on Chapter 4 yesterday on SS. Starting on Chp 5 and Chem today :)

And you know what?

I wanted to puase today and when I woke up at 4 To cook that stupid Mac & Cheese lah and went to toilet and then right, you know what I found?.....

I was ~~bocor~~. Haha. Taik ah...

I want to puase like mad seh!!!!!

But look on the bright side, at least I won't have the trouble of ~~bocor-ing~~ during Raye :)

Can't wait for that too :)

Read abit of Breaking Dawn yesterday and it was fun :)

I haven't even finished half of the book.

Weird. I'd normally finish books fast but I don't know. Maybe because I'm getting more tired by the day.

Guitar lesson yesterday was fun :)

We learnt Rooftops and I can play it one hour :)

I was prety good :) Need to work on the intro only :) The solo was fine for me becoz it was all in octaves and I LOVE playing octaves :) I know, I'm bragging but I'm quite good at octaves now judging that I'm plying Spring Nicht all the time :)

Haha.

Thinking about updating Chapter 12 of The Letter Says Don't Jump but I don't know. I really need to update on my vampire story!!! It's just sooo hard to write about Tom!!!

Urrrgghhh!!! Nk kentut ah....

Ok wait....

Ahhhh... Sedap sikit.

Hiaz. Exams on Tues and I'm nervous :)

Really am :)

I don't want to stay back :)

I really don't :)

I wanna go sec 4 :)

And get to Poly :)

And get to Events Management course :)

And if Allah is good to me :)

I'll get a job that I love :)

Or I'll go NAFA :)

Or if I'm really lucky :)

I'll be in a band :)

Be famous :)

Travel around the world :)

Spread music :)

Meet Tokio Hotel :)

Haha. Brangan je aku :)

I'm pretty much bored here so yeah...

I think I'm just gonna start fast on my story and end prob at 7am. Take a nap and mug again :)

Haha. Kk. Bye! And guten morgen :)

Es wird gesagt und getan
5:55 AM

Saturday, September 20, 2008

Just became a moving woman just now. Moved the things that Wak Paina gave. Haha. She came with her boyfriend. Haha.

So yeah. Been really tired this past few days. Trust me. I've started going to bed as early as 10pm. I don't know why but I've been very tired.

So yeah. Currently typing Chapter 11 for The Letter story and I like the plot the story is coming too.

I changed the ending again. Haha. AND I'm going to stick with that ending. Haha.

I also have the ending for The Vampire story. Gail. I'm glad I have an idea for the next chapter for that story becoz I've ignored that story for far too long.

Haha.

I've noticed something too. I've been writting alot of one-shot lately and yeah, I like it but I really don't like the way they're making me ignore my Chapter stories.

RITIENNE LIKES MY CHAPTER STORIES!!! And my one-shot too. Hehe.

Haha. okok.

I'm taking my own sweet time readinh Breaking Dawn. Haha.

Really. The book is fun! Especially about the tron pillows and the broken frame bed and the bruises. Haha. GAIL MAN!!!! And Bella's pregnancy :)

okok. I'm gonna continue with mu story update coz I'm going to my guitar class later and I need to continue on my SS notes after buke so yeah :)

Es wird gesagt und getan
1:57 PM

Thursday, September 18, 2008

Ok. I think that's it :) My fun day Well, not exactly day, more like buke with Diana :)
Met her in front of popular at 6.20pm. Went to JE library. Laugh ourselves stupid. Took stupid photos As shown above. Went to Galilee. I ate Spaghetti and she ate this combo special Which she didn't finish at the end and tapau it home :)

Ok. So funny things happened :)

First, Diana saw me waiting in front of Popular and ran like a freak smiling, while beside another girl. All of a sudden, she drop her bag and it look funny trust me and the girl beside her was trying to control her laugh.

Second, she hit her leg on the glass table at Galilee and she made a weird ooompphhh sound and almost everyone was looking at her.

Third, she became clumsy and drop a book from the shelves at Popular. She then wanted to put the book back properly but instead, another million books fell and she was like SYAFIQAH! Help me!! and I was like trying to hold my laugh. I can't remembered what I said to her so yeah.

Last, we went out of Popular and the door says PUSH. Diana, being the smart one, decided to pull and she almost cursed her heads off when the door did not open until she saw the PUSH sign.

Lame, I know but hey, at least I had fun :)

Danke Diana for the fun time :) I hope we get to do it again :)

Kk. I'm burning midnight oil today. I'm gonna do my malay bt not the Compo or the letter. Well, depends on my mood. But I'm gonna complete the Ws and I'll get to see her idiotic face tomorrow. Fudge her.

Haiz.... Kk. Guten nacht und ich liebe dih fur immer :)

I'm searching for my Edward
But he doesn't seem to show
But hey, I forgot something
Edward is already inside Bill Kaulitz
That, I already know :)

Es wird gesagt und getan
10:44 PM

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

I'M FUCKING OBSESS WITH TWILIGHT AND I LOOOOVVVVEEEE EDWARD AND I SOOO WANNA WANNA WATCH THE MOVIE!!!! Anybody wanna watch with me??

Haha. So OMG!!! Haha. Come come, let me show you why I love this sooo much :)

I LOVE Edward's sly smile at the end of the trailer!!!!! I want Edward!! But the Bill version!!!

Ok ok. The second trailer :) Haha. I love all the trailers :)

And this is the part when Edward and Bella and James, well, mostly Edward Aw... Melts... and James EEEEEE fights and OMG!!! I can imagine the scene until the end!! Gail!!!

OMG!!! All the trailers hot!!! And Jacobs HOT but EDWARD'S HOTTER!!! OMG!!!! WHY DOES HE LOOK SO UGLY IN HARRY POTTER?? HE LOOKS SO MUCH BETTER IN TWILIGHT!!!!!! I WANNA WATCH TWILIGHT!!!!!

Okok. Haha. Went back home with Maggie again.

Haha. I love Twilight :) 18.12.08. Here I come!!!

Haha. Kk. I no mood to write coz I'm to hyped up :) Cya!

Es wird gesagt und getan
9:27 PM

Monday, September 15, 2008

Haiz. Today fun day :) Yay!

Became crazy with Syu and Irfan and Diana and Suchi and Brintha :)

Happy Advanced Birthday Brintha :)

Then went home with my girlfriend Maggie Nah.

Haha

Then slept and now my neck is very sore...

Haiz... Not in good mood. Serious.

Sorry if this is... Insulting in a way. I mean, I couldn't help it. IT'S TOM FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE

Esmee's POV

"Nice guitar you got there."

I looked up from my guitar to see Tom Kaulitz, the guitarist of Tokio Hotel and my idol.

"Yeah. Thanks. Gibson Les Paul. You have one too right?"

"Yeah. I like playing the Ebony one but I feel like the white one is my lucky charm." He smiled as he sat down on the chair in front of me.

"Mine too." I returned his smile as I started strumming my guitar to my favourite sound.

"You're good you know that." He complimented as he adjusted his hat.

"Of course I am. If I'm not, I wouldn't be the lead guitarist for Within the Memories."

"True enough. You play that particular song well."

"It's my favourite. What can I say? I learned it from the best." I laughed before Tom switched off my amp.

"Before you go all whacks on me, what have you leant so far?" He asked, a sly grinned imprinted on his flawless face.

"Almost everything... Except Reden." I flirted back, playing along with his game.

"Well then... Why don't we go back to y tour bus and learn Reden?" He smirked before leaning in, slowly closing the gap between us.

"On second thought," I smiled, pulling away before we got too closed, "I have somewhere to go."

"Oh. Uh. Yeah. Sure. Um. Right." He blushed while looking dumbfounded.

"See you later." I chuckled befoe patting his back and walking away.

That was fun I thought to myself as my lips formed a wide grin.

-----------------

Tom's POV

Great! What a way to embarrass yourself Kaulitz! And you didn't even asked her for her number!

She's on tour with you for heaven's sake. Why don't you just ask her later?

It's complicated! She's just soo... Timid most of the time! That was the first time I saw her like that.

Yeah. You're one horny bastard aren't you?

I'm not a horny bastard! It's not my fault that girls want to get inside my pants.

Whatever bt I'm warning you, Esmee is not like those girls.

I'll keep that in mind.

I just shook my head before standing up and adjusted my hoodie, before a slip of paper dropped on the floor.

I picked it up before I smiled to myself.

555-88-968 Call me :)

----------------------------------------

----

Ok. I'm stuck here but I'm going to continue with it tomorrow. Haha. I like it alot.

Guitars, Love, Monsoon

Nice huh?

Haha. That's the tittle of the story :)

Kk. I'm changing my song to The Ghost Of You.

I don't why but that's what I'm feeling right now.

I cry everytime I hear or watch this. Don't blame me. The vid's sad and the song is well WONDERFUL but don't worry. I'm NOT crying now :)

Haha. Or should I change it to Beichte? Haha. I'm undecisive... Well. Put 2 songs in 1! Wee!

Haha. Watch this :)

Misheard words from Ich Bin Nicht Ich. I know you saw it before but now it's the complete one!!

Wow. The song sounds abit different than how it's played now :)

BILL HAWT!!!! AHHH I LOVE HIS VOICE AND THIS VERSION!! THAT'S IT!! I'M PUTTING UP THAT SONG!!!

Ok... Now I'm emoing for Spring Nicht... Hmmm. Well!! I think I should!

I know this is funny but hey... The song gets to me ALL time. Haha. Gail :)

Ouh this is sad.... Especially the Bridge and the last chorus... Gosh!! It's soooo wow!!! My god!! Okay. Im having butterflies in my stomach right now :)

Wow... Spring Nicht is really the song that can build me up and break me down :)

I thought about the ending of my letter story while listening to that song and I cried. Seriously :)

Haha. Gail. Kk. I gtg. Byez :)

Es wird gesagt und getan
8:56 PM

Sunday, September 14, 2008

Today was fun but I can't tok much. It's like 1.02am and my mum nagging so yeah.

Here's a one-shot I wrote for Ritienne. I hope she likes it :)

A girl once promised me that once she got her license, she was going to take me for a ride on her bike.

But, that was 6 years ago.

Her name was Winter Thorn. My neighbour and my bestfriend.

We did everything together, just like typical bestfriends do and I wouldn't trade her for anything...

Well... Not exactly.

We fought, for the first time in history and it all ended there...

"I hate you!" She shouted, anger in her voice.

It was the first time I've seen her so angry before.

"Why are you being so difficult?" I snapped, pushing her unintentionally.

"No! Why are YOU being so difficult? You say I'm your bestfriend but why are doing this to me?" She replied, pushing me back.

"But you must understand, Winter! I can't bring you with me!"

"I don't care if you can bring me or not! Wait, I don't give a shit if you want to bring me along on your stupid tour! But why must you bring that stupid slut of yours?"

That was her last words before my right hand met her left cheeks.

"Winter. I'm soo sorry." I apologised, trying to hug her only to be pushed away.

"Stay away from me Bill. I don't know who you are anymore... Who exactly are you? You're not the Bill I used to know." She said, looking at me with her green eyes.

I couldn't help but shrugged my shoulders, avoiding her gaze.

"What happened to you? Has all this fame made you selfish?"

"Winter, I--"

"Save it. The Bill I knew died a long time ago. Go be with Ashley for all I care... Do you know how stupid I feel right now? I thought that maybe if I wait, you'll come back to me and be my friend again. Maybe if I have more patience, the Bill that I used to play with will come back. How wrong was I to think like that." She smirked before turning her back and walking away.

I grabbed her arm before she turned again, this time, tears were threatening to fall.

"Wait."

"What?"

"Does this mean we're not friends anymore?" I asked, hoping that she would say no.

"That's for you to decide..."

Then, she was gone.

That was pretty much what happened.

I turned my back on my bestfriend for fame, fortune and for my first girlfriend, Ashley. We broke up in the end though.

I just wished to see Winter again... I miss her soo much.

*Screeeenchhhh*

"Watch where you're going!" A woman shouted, immeaditely stopping her black bike in front of me.

"You could have been killed! Didn't your mom ever told you to look left and right before crossing the road?" She shouted again, before taking off her helmet.

For a guy who almost got hit by a bike, I sure am stupid but I couldn't help it. Her eyes, her hair, her lips. I must be dreaming!

"Hello? Are deaf?" She asked, getting off her bike.

"Winter?" I asked, shocked, amazed, whatever you call it as I took my sunglasses.

"Bill?!"

"Omg! It's Bill!"

"Omg!"

"Bill!"

"Oh shit..." I mutteres under my breath as the sound of screaming girls filled my ears.

"Hurry. Come on." Winter said as I hurried onto her bike, wrapping my hands on her hips as we sped off.

"Remind me to thank you later." I said, in between breaths.

-----------------------------------

"Thank you again for just now." I smiled as Winter tied her long black hair.

It didn't use to be long. Her fringe wasn't highlighted white like before.

"No problem. So what are you doing here?" She asked, no averting her eyes to meet mine.

"We have a concert here and I was just walking around."

"I see." She replied as she sat down on the grass before I did the same.

"Nice bike."

"Danke. My dad bought it for me 3 years ago."

"The exact one that you wanted huh?"

She turned her head and smiled, "You still remembered?"

"Of course I did. Why wouldn't I?" I smirked before the smile on her face was wipe off.

"Ouh... I thought you didn't remember at all." Her voice down and weary.

"Winter... I--"

"So how's things going on with you and Ashley?" She caught me off guard as if she knew what I was going to say.

"We... Broke up a few years ago. Things wasn't working out. Especially when you left. Why did you go anyway?" I asked, remembering the awful incident 6 years ago.

"I got a scholarship from America. That's why I left..."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"I wanted to but then that happened and I don't know..."

She bowed her head, not wanting to look at me.

"I'm sorry. I should have listened to you. I wanted you to come with me on that tour but I was afraid."

"What were you afraid about?" She asked, finally looking at me.

"I... Don't know... I was just afraid that maybe I would lose you."

"You losing me? Why would you even think like that? You know that you mean the world to me."

"I was afraid that you'll reject me..."

Her eyes became wide, not believing what she was hearing.

"Re-rejecting you?" She stuttered, obviously wanting to hear what I meant.

"I love you, Winter. I really do but some part of me was telling me that you don't feel the same way about I do... That's why I backed out. I didn't wanted it to turn out that bad."

I was waiting for her reaction and part of me was telling me that she's going to stand up, turn her back on me like I did to her and walk away.

I guess that part of me was right when she stood up, turned her back and walked back to her bike.

I sighed as I stared at the green grass. I guess it wasn't meant to be then.

"Are you coming?"

My head shot up, shocked when I saw her smiling.

"Vas?"

"I said, are you coming?"

"Coming to where?" I raised my eyebrow, confused.

"You forgot? I promised you that once I got my license, I'll take you on a ride on my bike."

I smiled before getting up and walking towards her.

Before I got up the bike, Winter took my arm and spun me around, kissing me and catching me off guard.

"And for the record Bill the oh so famous Kaulitz. I love you too." She smiled before putting back on her helmet.

"Ready? Hold on tight." She smirked before starting the engines and letting the wind comb my hair.

"Aren't we going a little too fast?" I asked, worried about the speed she was riding at.

"Chill. You still the sissy aren't you?" She replied in between laughter.

"Yup. I'm the sissy whom you are in love with."

I couldn't help but smirked at my last comment.

The speed of the wind is nothing compared to the rate of my heart was beating as I hold Winter close to me.

I promise you, Winter, I'm never going to let you go this time.

I hope that was nice.

Ouh and for Kak Nat, I promised you that I was gonna record Monsoon acoustic rite?

Well, it's finally here :) But... Before that :) Here's Cristina with Spring Nicht :) Hers is sooo much better than mine :)

Gail huh? Well, I see if I can re-record mine coz I finally know how to adjust my pedal :)

Now... Dun laugh hor!!!

Kk. guten nacht aite :)

Es wird gesagt und getan
1:01 AM

Friday, September 12, 2008

Din go to school today... Was not in the mood actually.

I don't want to say why becoz later I'll be called an insensitive person again.

Sorry to my liebes, Diana, Maggie, Irfaniah, Anira, Atikah, Syuhadah and Suchi for not comin to school today.

Haiz... Finished the Swtichers story and I'm bored again...

Gail.

I thought about the Vampire story and I got and ending for it.

Its nice.

Haha.

Ok. I'm just gonna do some random quizzes :)

1. Write the name of a person of the opposite sex.
Bill Kaulitz
You are completely in love with this person

2. Which is your favorite color out of red, black, blue, green, yellow?
Black
Black: You are conservative and aggressive.
Ok...

3. Your first initial?
N
L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to
blossom.

4. Your month of birth?
July
July-Sept.: You will have a great year and will experience a major life
changing experience for the good.
I agree with this one actually :)

5. Which color do you like more, black or white?
I dun noe... I like both colors but... BLACK
Black: Your life will take on a different direction, it will seem hard at the time
but will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.
True true. It's true. Haha. true

6. Name of a person of the same sex as yours.
Kak Nadirah
This person is your best friend.
This is DEFINATELY true :)

7. Your favorite number?
19
This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime.
Wow... That little?

8. Do you like California or Florida more?
None. I like Germany :)

9. Do you like the lake or the ocean more?
Of course ocean :)
You are spontaneous and like to please people.
True. I like to please people but some people dun appreciate it and stabs you OR calls you insentsitive :)

10. Write down a wish (a realistic one).
Be happy and get the Gibson/Epiphone Lespaul Custom White Guitar :) And have Bill also :) I know it's a wish but what do I care?

11. Pick people to do this quiz :)
All the people in my Liebes quiz. My cuzzins. Teik Wei. Nad.

The answers to your questions but do the quiz frist before checking the answer :)
1. You are completely in love with this person.
2. If you choose:
Red: You are alert and your life is full of love.
Black: You are conservative and aggressive.
Green: Your soul is relaxed and you are laid back.
Blue: You are spontaneous and love kisses and affection from the ones you
love.
Yellow: You are a very happy person and give good advice to those who are
down.
3. If your initial is:
A-K: You have a lot of love and friendships in your life.
L-R: You try to enjoy life to the maximum and your love life is soon to
blossom.
S-Z: You like to help others and your future love life looks very good.
4. If you were born in:
Jan.-Mar.: The year will go very well for you and you will discover that you
fall in love with someone totally unexpected.
Apr.-June: You will have a strong love relationship that will not last long but
the memories will last forever.
July-Sept.: You will have a great year and will experience a major life
changing experience for the good.
Oct.-Dec.: Your love life will not be too great, but eventually you will find your
soul mate.
5. If you choose...
Black: Your life will take on a different direction, it will seem hard at the time
but will be the best thing for you, and you will be glad for the change.
White: You will have a friend who completely confides in you and would do
anything for you, but you may not realize it.
6. This person is your best friend.
7. This is how many close friends you have in a lifetime.
8. If you choose...
California: You like adventure.
Florida: You are a laidback person.
9. If you choose...
Lake: You are loyal to your friends and your love. And you are very reserved.
Ocean: You are spontaneous and like to please people.

Ok. Haha. that was fun :)

Going Geylang later :) WEE DUU That means I'll get to see my Char Kway! I miss it sooo much :)

Hmm... I have this one-shot in my head but I don't think it's good enough...

Ok. I just deleted the one I typed just now. It was.... Ok. I WAS STUCK after FOUr LINES!

But... This is going to be short. Trust me.

"Hey Bubu."

I just smiled, looking at him.

"Hey Baba." I replied before his hands were wrapped around me.

He was my bestest friend. My life. The person who picked me up when I was down and out.

"Missed me?" He asked as we pulled away, his eyes glimmering under the light.

"Nein. Had Kevin to accompany me when you're gone." I smirked as the both of us made our way to my room.

"Food or drinks? You must be starving? Where's the rest?"

"You think I want them to interrupt us? And a coke would be nice." He smiled before I got him a can of his favourite drink.

19 years of being friends. That's really nice.

He may look like a a shagger but the truth is, he's the nicest thing that has happened to me so far.

Tha day when my mum and dad seperated, he was there. The day when Matt, my first boyfriend, left me for my step-sister, he was there. He was there for me all the time, even after he had to leave.

"Here? So how's everything? It must be fun going around the world doin what you do." I asked as the both us of just jumped and landed on my bed.

"Everything's fine except one time, where I woke up naked beside Bill. That was horrible!"

"Tell me about it? So how's the girls? Found anyone that you fancied and... Shagged?" I smirked knowing he hates talking about his hobby.

"Of course! I found alot of them and I'm sure you're jealous because you never shagged anyone before!" He smiled slyly nefore tickling me on my sides.

"Stop it! Ah! You idiot!" I screamed as I attepmted to tickled him back.

After a few minutes of tickling, his lips met mine.

"Woah. What was that about Kaulitz?" I asked, still dazed from what happened.

"What? It was just a kiss." He smirked, licking his lips.

"Just a kiss eh?" I said as I returned the smirk before closing the gap in between us again.

"Now YOU tell me what was that?" Tom asked, his brown eyes engraved in my green ones.

"That was called making-out. I'm sure you've done it before." I said, holding bak laughter due to his funny face.

"Ok... I like you."

"I like you too, Kaulitz."

"No as in like like you."

"I like like you too." I smiled.

"I'm serious!"

"I'm serious too."

"Stop doing that!" He grunted.

"Stop doing what?"

"Th--"

It was peaceful. Yes it was.

We pulled away, smiling widely.

The day couldn't be any better.

The day my bestfriend became my boyfriend.

Ok. That was... Chessy. VERY chessy.. Haha. Whatever. Haha. At least I like it :)

Kk. Da da bubus!!

Es wird gesagt und getan
12:16 PM

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Ok... I took that quiz like 10 times and I still got that results! WTH?

Haha. Am I like that? It makes me feel like I'm Edward Cullen. Haha. GAIL

I'm not born to be a blood-thirsty vampire. I'm born to be a nice vampire.

Haha.

Yeah. I want to be a vampire but not those type that killed people for blood :)

Haha.

Ok... Haha. I admit. I AM worried but I have no idea what I'm worried about :)

Ok. I got no comment for this one. How bout you tell me if you agree with it?

Haiz... Nothing much going on.

I finished the library book that I borrowed Flawless and I'm in LOVE with Toby, the mysterious guy who into goth but not that heavy kind.

Too bad he died... He commited suicide and he really liked Emily but no.... Emily thought he killed Alison and she din believe him.

If I was Emily, I would just ignore my conscience and kissed Toby :)

Maggie lending me Eclipse tomorow :) I can't wait :)

Haha. I really dunno wad to say... Um.... Ouh Haha. Byez :)

Es wird gesagt und getan
10:39 PM

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Felt bad coz of fudging mom. What the heck :) Tk gune tk gune ah.

Tk gune jugak last last dtg mintak tlg jugak pe. Mcm tk kenal perangai die gitu.

Malas ah nk layan.

At least Bill und om cheered me up :)

Happy belated burfdae to Bill und Tom again!

Happy belated burfdae to Gustav as his burfdae was yesterday :)!

Enjoy! I wanna learn this and guess wad?? I figured out the chords oredi!!! I wantched Tom play!!! WEE DUU!!

Es wird gesagt und getan
10:26 PM

Halfway thorough Moonlight now. Haha.

I tried doin what Suchi asked me to do. Plug my ears with Stay With Me and play it over and over again when reading the story and.... IT DOESN'T WORK!! I DON'T FEEL ANYTHING!!!

Haha. But I was holding back tears in class when I read the part where Edward left her. And Jacob leaving her too. THAT was sad.

Haha.

I still need to edit the Camp Rock. Need to lend it to Pris. Haha. Sorry Priscilla!

Wasn't feeling great actually after maths remedial coz Brenda really pissed me and amused me at the same time.

But I'll write about that later :)

Ritienne messaged me and she said she like my Bill One Shot. Haha. Gail :)

Ouh. So let me continue.

She said she never lies.
Yeah right... Haha. What about that time you didn't bring yor Geog file and din own up to teacher. Instead, you took MY file and cancelled MY name and write yours on it instead?

She said she never copies any homework from anyone before.
Haha. Vey funny. Then what about the time you took Wayne's homework and copied it? Isn't that copying?

Whatever lah Brenda.

You smsed that shit to me on Teacher's Day. What was that message again? Uh.

Oh Yes!

No matter how much you hate me, I still don't hate you

Ok... You want to convince me to get back together with you and now, you're telling Brintha that you hate Diana and ME.

And what's up with telling Brintha that she's INVISIBLE and no one notices her?

Hello? Who's the one invisible here??

Think before you spit out blood from your mouth.

Oh! Better not use Literature! You will probably think that blood really come out of you mouth :) So much for saying you VERY good in Lit...

You always talk big. Say what? Bio is not good. Take A maths better.

When people get higher marks than you for tests, instead of saying Congrats :), you say Aiya. You taiko wan lah. Sure next time I higher than you

Ok... If you sooooo clever then why didn't you beat me in SA1??

Really.

Maybe the problem is not me or Diana. Maybe it's YOU who's suffering from the problem.

And brainwashing is soooo last century!

Why would WE want to brainwash Brintha?

Haha.

We're nice. We don't steal Brintha, your "Bestfriend" away from you.

And FYI, Brintha doesn't see you as her "Bestfriend".

You're just too shallow to get the message.

Let me give you one advice.

A friend is not someone that you can buy with your sweet talk.

Yeah, you're sweet talk might work on her Example, me but it takes more than just sweet sweet sweet talks to keep that friend.

You don't go around talking behind her backs. Stabbing her with a knife.

Friendship is worth more than anything valuable in this world.

It takes quite sometime to build but it takes a mere second just to crash and burn.

Just like you and me, Brenda Koh.

We were friends for like what? 5 months? And all you did to break that friendship was to talk behind my back to Brintha.

Fun right?

If you want a friend, you cherish that person.

But of course, you never had a real friend before so you wouldn't know how to cherish your friends.

And for the record, I WAS NEVER YOUR BESTFRIEND

Let me repeat that...

NEVER YOUR BESTFRIEND

So nxt time, think before you go around and say to people

You know why we click so well? It's becoz we're ~~BESTFRIENDS~~ :)

You think me, Diana and Brintha are dumb just becoz we're not smart in acadamic skills but guess what?

You're dumber than us when it comes to living life.

I wish you all the best of luck in getting Wayne becoz you really need alot of luck to get Wayne.

Haha. Funny :)

Haha. Seriously. That girl cracks me up.

So yesterday was the VMAs and TOKIO HOTEL WON THE BEST NEW ARTIST AWARDS!!!!

Beating Miley Cyrus and Jonas Brothers!!! Woohoo!!!!!

Haha. I'm glad they won :)

Ok then. I guess I better go update my stories. Haha :)

Nacht aite people :)

Es wird gesagt und getan
8:18 PM

Sunday, September 7, 2008

Haiz... Tomorrow school starts and it sucks...

Am very happy today becoz... I don't really know why but I have a MIBBA account!! Haha. I know. LAME but I mean I've had it since I was pri 6 or Sec 1 and I just did some things to my profile page and it was GAIL

Actually I updated almost all my stories there but it got deleted just now becoz I wasn't following one of the rules. Haha. Silly me. I should have checked the rules properly :)

Haha. Can't wait to see the rest tomorrow :)

Ouh and tika!! Maybe I tell you the Char Kway nye kedai kat ane coz It's hard to send you through sms :)

Kk. Byez

Ouh!! And visit my profil!! WEEDUU!!

Es wird gesagt und getan
4:43 PM

Saturday, September 6, 2008

Went to Geylang and search the entire bazaar for that Irresistable Char Kway and finally found it! Bought 2 kotaks I wanted to buy 3 like last year and ate one during Buke. Then eat the Turkey ice-cream which is NICE. You should go try :)

Read back all my previous post just now and... I agree with all of them. I'm not going to take them down becoz it's who I am. Blah blah blah blah. Still not in a good mood so yeah...

Maybe I'll spoil Suchi's mood for a while haha. By typing out the Maybe ending for TLSDJ :)

---

On second thought. Nein. Maybe I should continue with my Frank story that I abondoned 2 years ago? Haha. Bt ImNotOkay.net deleted it oredi so must write again rite... Hmm....

"Maybe he does?"

"Nein. If he does, he would have asked me out a long time ago..."

"Maybe he's shy?"

"Impossible! He being shy? You have got to be kidding me..."

"Maybe he's--"

"I'll tell you what. Since you're a vampire and you can read minds, unlike me, who's a witch, maybe you can tell me what he thinks of me." Ashley suggested, looking at me with eager eyes.

"Nein. Never. I'll never use my gift for such evil acts... Unless neccesary." I smirked before being thrown with a pillow.

"Aw common!"

"Nein! Besides, I can't read his mind or Bill's mind or Gustav's mind or Georg's mind! They're the chosen ones remember..." I said, rolling my eyes,

"Oh yeah. Hey, have you heard about the killings that has been happening in school?"

"Yeah. What about it?"

"I heard that the fifth chosen one is here... And they are out to find her and kill her." Ashley replied, fear instilled in her eyes.

"It's a her? How did you know?"

"It's confirm that it's a girl. I studied the Prophecy...
The death of the monsters lead rise to the birth of 5 souls
One from Fire
The other from Water
Two from the Earth that split into 2
For 4 souls that have been born
Only with the 5th soul born on the break of midnight
The soul that could bring life to another
They would be able to stop the black sea

One from fire is Georg. The one from water is Gustav. The 2 from the splited Earth is the Kaulitz and finally, the soul that could bring life to another. Which means that she could give birth to another soul."

"Ouh. So the 5th chosen one is a girl currently studying in this school?"

"Yeap. That's why strange killings have been happening in this school. The Sharman is here looking for the 5th soul."

"But why kill the 5th? Why not Bill or Tom or Georg or Gustav?" I asked, flipping through my Literature Textbook.

"The 5th soul is the key soul needed to destroy that Sharman. Without her, the other four can't do anything."

"That's shitty." I commented before...

----

Ok. I'm stuck. Yet again :)

I tried to log-in to my old Quizilla accounts and guess what?? I found nice poems that I wrote in Sec 1 and Sec 2!! I miss my poetry writting skills... I can't seem to write any poems now a days... Haiz....

Ouh! And I oso found the first and second Chapter for the Frank story :) Bt confirm shitty one coz I remembered that the first few parts was shitty :) It only got better when fantasy was put inside :) This is so going to be a long post :)

Haha. I malas to copy and paste. Haha.

Kk. I malas to type so.......... BYEZ!!

Es wird gesagt und getan
11:05 AM

Friday, September 5, 2008

Just bored and my mum lupe nk bangun sahur tadi so yeah... Could already feel my stomach growling but nah... I WANNA PUASE!!!

So now, I don't know what to type so... Uh... Yea..

Ouh!! N I BOUGHT THIS NEW STAPLER!!! AND IT'S BLACK!!!

I dunnno... I still feel down and don't mind me if my next post are stories becoz I write alot when I'm feeling all shitty...

"How do I look? Do you think my hair is alright? Maybe it's a little flat? Maybe I should comb it back with gel. Yeah. What do you think?" Bill asked looking at me.

I just sighed before going up to him and taking off his bowed tie, his black tuxedo jacket and his weird belt before pushing him down the bed.

"What are you doing? Samantha likes those things!"

"Shut up Bill!"

I took a red skull t-shirt, a normal black jeans, a studded belt, a choker and some make-up before walking back up to Bill.

"Take off that lousy, ugly white shirt and that stupid pants and put these on."

"But but--"

"No buts." I stated before Bill shrugged and took off his clothes.

"Are you sure you don't mind me changing here?"

"Nein. I've seen you naked since we were 3. Just go change." I said to Bill who slowly took off his clothes before putting on the ones that I gave him.

"Now sit down here and close you eyes." I instructed Bill, who only gave me a sad face, after he changed.

I look at his flawless face and smiled before putting on the necessary things on it.

"Now open."

"But Sky... You know how much this date means to me. Samantha doesn't like me looking like this."

"If she likes you, like she says she does, she will accept you for who you are. You're handsome, kind and wonderful. It's her loss if she turns you down." I smiled before stroking his fringe.

He returned my smile before hugging me.

"I don't know what I'll do if you're not here with me right now." He said before kissing my cheeks.

"Yeah. I don't now what I'll do either if you're not here." I replied pulling away from, trying hard not to show him 'me'.

"I better get going. Wish me luck alright." He stood up before walking out of the bus.

"Good luck..." I whispered before sitting down on his bed.

A moment of silence took over as I started thinking before Tom decided to break that silence.

"Why don't you just tell him? I don't really like seeing you like this Sky... It's been like what? 5 years?"

"No. 6 years. It has been 6 years..." I replied trying hard to blink the tears in my eyes away.

6 years of hoping and 6 years of waiting. It has always been the same.

6 years... How many months is that? 72 months?

Many things had happen during that period of time. Especially because Bill had hit puberty.

Bill started dating girls and it all turned out the same. None of his relationship lasted long. Most of the time, well, not most but all of the time, he'll come back from a date, sad and frustrated.

It's sad just looking at him like that.

"Why don't you just go tell him how you feel?" Tom asked as he stroke my back.

"I can't... I'm scared."

"That's the thing about you girls. You all are just afraid to get rejected."

"Easy for you to say... You never got rejected before." I chuckled before Tom hugged me.

"Correction. You remember Kim in school?"

"That popular Kim? Yeah."

"I got rejected by her." Tom smiled as he yawned.

"Haha. Oh yeah. I forgot about that one. You're tired huh?" I asked, pinching Tom's cheeks.

"Yup. I'm going to bed. You go tell him ok."

"I can't promise you that. Nacht."

"Nacht."

After watching Tom tucked himself into bed, I wondered if I should tell Bill about how I feel.

Maybe Tom's right. Maybe I AM afraid of rejection. Maybe I'm afraid that Bill wouldn't feel the same way about me.

Maybe this is the right time...

------------------------------------

A loud thud awoke me from my slumber.

"What time is it again?" I thought to myself before checking my wristwatch.

3.23am

Bill should be back by now.

I slowly stood up and blindly made my way to Bill's bed in the dark.

"Bill?" I whispered before I notice his hair through the dark.

"Hey. How's the date?" I asked softly before sitting down beside him.

There was silence.

"Bill?" I asked again, this time, I placed his hair behind his ears only to find that he was crying silently.

"No. Not again..." I said as I hugged him.

It has happen again. De Ja Vu for Bill... Again.

"I don't get it. Why do some girls just don't like me for who I am?" He sobbed silently.

"They're just stupid."

"It's either their stupid or I'm just not good enough for them."

"Look. There's still other girls out there. Let me tell you something about girls like Samantha. They suck because the only reason they like you is because you're a famous rockstar. They also suck because they always try to change you. You are who you are and you don't need to look or be stupid to be Romeo." I stated, wiping his tears away.

"I guess I'll never find a girl that likes or loves me for who I am..." He sighed before I smiled.

"And that's when you're wrong... You're handsome, kind, funny, smart and stupid. Anyone would love you for who you are."

"So? No still loves me."

"I do."

Bill turned and looked at me with shock painted in his eyes.

I couldn't help but turn away. It was embarrasing telling him how I really feel and at the same time, fear was instilled in me too.

"You... do?" He stuttered with a questioning look in his face.

"Always did and always will... You don't know how beautiful or how talented you are. You keep saying that you're not good for anyone but the truth is... You're too good for anyone. Even me..." I softly confessed before Bill placed his index finger on my lips.

"That's not true. Do you know how much I've dreamt to hear THAT coming out of your mouth?"

There was a moment of silence before Bill hugged me.

"I love you Sky. I fucking love you."

I couldn't but smile back before laughing softly.

"I love you too, Bill."

"Oh and Sky? Please don't ask me to dress up like Draco Malyfoy. Please. I beg of you!"

"Oh! So that's why you were wearing that stupid tux today! Haha." I laughed, pulling away from the hug.

"Together?" Bill asked, the phrase that me and him used to make fun of when watching All That.

"Forever." I smiled.

Together Forever. That's nice.

Well, that's it. Not bad luh. Actually I wanted a different ending but.... Nah!! Ich liebe this one!!! Weee!! Kk. Byez :)

Haha! Yes! I going Geylang later so can go on Char Kway search!! WEEE!

Es wird gesagt und getan
9:59 AM

Thursday, September 4, 2008

It's raining, it's pouring and 3 of my family members are snoring while one is at school.

It has been raining alot and I like it Even though it makes me have flu or running nose and I don't know. The rain just depicts my mood or maybe my feelings.

Had a chat with CS Yes, it's CS.. Hehe :) yesterday and we talked things out.

It's sad to know that the Bladders are now GONE...

Haha.

So I woke up this morning and guess wad?? I AM PUASE-ING RITE NOW!!! OFFICIAL TAU!!!

Then I try sleep but cannot so woke up at 8++, watch Fitri for a while then go bath then bored so decided to make 2 covers. Haha. I'll put it up when I finish uploading it at youtube. Comment aite :)

But... The sound quality BAD.... Haha.

Spring Nicht Cover

Durch Den Monsun Cover

So yeah... Haha. Hope it's nice.

kk. I wanna go, I dunno wd to write anymore and there's thunder here so... Guten Morgen aite!!!

Es wird gesagt und getan
10:41 AM

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

I just read Fani's blog and I'm just... I don't know.

I don't care if I hurt the others but hurting Irfaniah, Atikah and Syuhadah is just a bad as taking a knife and murduring my own parents.

I'm sorry Guys. I really tried to keep it together. I wanted this Workforce to last, I did. You don't know how much I loved you guys. I would do anything for you guys but I just cracked.

Sometimes I think that I'm just thinking about myself. Maybe I'm not good enough to be in the Bladders Workforce becoz I'm not like that.

I'm not smart.
I'm not clever.
I'm not nice.

It didn't bother me at first but it slowly burned my skin and I snapped.

Sometimes I wonder if I've gone too far in what I had done.

I'm sorry if I hurt anyone, especially Iraniah.

You guys don't know how much Irfaniah meant to me.

I love her like crazy. I would do anything for her.

She was there for me all the time but somehow, I felt that I didn't do the same for her.

Sometimes I think that maybe all of this happened because of me...

Maybe my impatience blew everything into bits and pieces.

Maybe my attitude caused this volcano to errupt.

Maybe my selfishness destroyed everything...

I appreciate all the times we've shared but it kills me to say this.

You don't know how many times I've fought with myself when the thought of leaving the Bladders came up in my mind.

You don't know how many times I've fought with my mum over Faiziyyah.

I don't know who I am anymore.

I don't care what the rest say about my decision but I care about what Irfaniah says.

I don't want her to get hurt. I never did.

I don't know...

I hate the voices in my head!

I hate them for always telling me what's right and I hate it when they're right!

I hate the voices for not letting me hide my feelings and lie to the ones I love so that they'll not get hurt!

I hate myself...

LEAVE ME ALONE...

Es wird gesagt und getan
1:53 PM

Wasn't feeling in a happy mood just now but thanks to Spring][Nicht and her one-shot stories, I feel SOOOO much better. :)

Haha. Yesterday was tiring. I was asleep by 8++pm. Early huh?

Haha. Ouh and I'm not a Bladder animore. I told that to Irfaniah and yeap. I'm not a bladder anymore :)

So I'm just Syafiqah, Down-Syndrome. No Bladder behind it :)

Haiz... Dunno what to do actually.... Um... Uh.....

Seriously... Um... Dh lh. Haha. Byez!!

Es wird gesagt und getan
12:46 PM

Monday, September 1, 2008

Just bored so I'm going to write a short I think and simple story that comes to my mind...

Before I start... LOOK AT THIS!!! HE'S FUCKING HOT LIKE BRITNEY!!! AND HE ROCKS MY SOCKS!!!

And look at this!! He's one hot girl man! He's like Britney's sister!! I soooo adores this guy's prettiness!!

"Are you done?"

"Nein! Not yet!"

I opened the door and stepped outside, revealing my new look to Gustav.

"What happened to you?" Gustav stated, shocked at my appearance.

"So how does it look?" I asked, nervous for his answer.

"You're not Lisa are you?" Gustav asked as he pinched my arm.

"Of course I am Gustav! I mean, hello? We didn't see each other for 3 months so it's ok to be shock." I smiled.

"What did you do to the weight? The glasses? The weird hair? Where's the NERDYNESS!!"

"Common! We're 15 now! Relax. I'm still the nerdy me who likes to dig my eyes on books." I cheeckily smiled before we made our way to the party and Georg's house.

"The guys are sooo going to freak. Especially Tom! He's like going to have to swallow his words when he sees you. I'm still not convince that you're Lisa!!"

"Well, I am!"

"Hey Gustav and who's this?" Tom asked, looking at me slyly.

"Lisa." Gustav said, trying hard not to laugh as I pushed Tom aside and made my way in.

"Hey Bill." I greeted Bill who was sitting on the couch before I sat down beside him.

"Hey... Lisa?!?" Bill exclaimed, mouth agap before he hugged me.

"Haha. Hi Bill! I missed you."

"Who destroyed you?"

"Me. You like it?"

"I love it." He replied, smiling.

"Listen, there's something I want to talk to you about a long time ago but I didn't have the guts so can we go outside and chat?"

"Yeah. Sure thing."

-------

"Ok. Now, Lisa, pick a number from this bag." Georg instructed me as he handed me a green bag.

"We're not playing 7 minutes in heaven are we? Please tell me we're not..."

Ok. Now I'm stuck. Haha. Kk. I think I go look at some tabs first then I go sllep. I need to get out of the house at 6.30 tomorrow :) So... NACHT LIEBES!!!

Es wird gesagt und getan
9:41 PM

So much for wanting to go to the library today. Haha. Malas ah. Haha

Yesterday met up wif my cuzins I miss them :) and we had a small, simple kenduri and ate like crazy :)

Haha. Then they sembayang traweh and all that then we tok and after that just went home. Haha

Aiya. Tmrw choir sia... I schooling from 8.30am to 5.30pm seh... Taik...

Haha. I dunno what to write oredi luh. Haha. Kk. Byez!!

-----

Es wird gesagt und getan
3:08 PM